Glass Half Full with Leslie Krongold, Ed.D.

Tag: fibromyalgia

  • Let’s Rant: Unhelpful Advice

    Let’s Rant: Unhelpful Advice

    It’s April Fool’s Day so we’re mixing things up with an unhelpful advice rant. One can’t be positive 100% of the time. Now is the opportunity to share about all of the weird things people have said about our health conditions — whether it was a friend, an aunt, or even a health care professional.

    Perhaps well-intentioned but definitely not insightful nor helpful advice. Most people with some type of chronic health condition have had this experience.

    A panel of three previous podcast guests share their stories — from the hilarious to the frightening. Nancy, Melissa, and Laurel let it all out.

  • Patient Advocates, Patient Leaders

    • Andrea Klein
      Andrea L. Klein
    • Melissa Talwar & Leslie Krongold
      Melissa Talwar

    What is a Patient Advocate? A patient advocate can be an actual patient with a mental and/or physical health condition, a caregiver for someone with a health condition, or a paid professional advocating on behalf of others with a health condition.

    Andrea L. Klein, of Cleveland, Tennessee, has collagen six intermediate congenital muscular dystrophy. She started a Facebook group, Breathe with MD Support Group, for people with a neuromuscular disease who struggle with respiratory health. Recently, she established a nonprofit organization with the same name.

    Melissa Talwar, of Pasadena, California, has struggled with fibromyalgia since she was 14 years old. Her experiences with different medications and their alarming side effects catapulted her into focused research on the condition and potential treatments. After volunteering with a patient advocacy organization and then traveling around the U.S. to meet others with fibromyalgia, Melissa also established a nonprofit organization.

  • The Power of Prayer

    The Power of Prayer

    What is prayer and how do we do it? How does prayer differ from meditation? How can prayer impact healing? These are a few of the questions addressed by three podcast guests. The Jewish perspective of prayer from a rabbi who has faced cancer and chronic pain. The Christian perspective of prayer from a Baptist pastor whose late wife battled autoimmune disease and young son is in remission from cancer. And the perspective of a yoga therapist who has studied Christian mysticism.

    To learn more about the Unity World Day of Prayer (September 12), visit their website.

    Guests featured in this podcast episode are Molly Lannon Kenny, Rabbi Robin Leonard Nafshi, and Pastor Jay Holland.

    An earlier podcast episode is with Dr. Lamar Hardwick – The Autism Pastor.

    Transcript

    welcome to glass half full with leslie krongold she shares her stories experiences and knowledge of living and coping with a chronic health condition learn about tools and resources and hear inspirational interviews that help you to live a life filled with quality and dignity with two decades of support group leadership leslie’s ready to help you make lemonade out of life’s lemons are you ready you ready welcome to the glass half full podcast if this is your first time listening i hope you’ll check out some of the episodes from the past three and a half years this is our 75th episode if something you hear resonates for you then it’s quite possible that many of the previous episodes have something to offer you as well i’ve wanted to tackle this topic of prayer for a while in fact we certainly have talked about the power of faith and prayer in other episodes a couple of years ago i spoke with the autism pastor dr lamar hardwick in georgia and in one of our caregiver themed episodes we spoke about faith but we’ve never focused specifically on the power of prayer i chose now because thursday september 12th next week is designated as the unity world day of prayer this happens every year but i was able to plan ahead this time so on september 12th for 24 hours there are activities you can engage in either virtually on the internet or perhaps in your local community you’ll have to check out the links i’ve included on the glass apple website to learn more so for this episode i spoke with three people about prayer i’m often curious about the differences between prayer and meditation two of my guests address this the first guest is molly lennon kenny who is a yoga therapist teacher writer you’ll learn more about molly in a later interview i was reading her book to prepare for my interview with her about bedside yoga something she’s been doing for nearly 20 years and i realized during the interview that she’d be the perfect person to reflect on the similarities between prayer and meditation

    the second person i interviewed is an old friend from college new york university rabbi ramen letter nafshi i can’t recall what robin was studying in college but she went to law school soon after her undergraduate time and for years robin worked for nolo press writing self-help legal books here in san francisco she was active in a local synagogue and was a big help to me when i made my documentary film on women rabbis but at that time she wasn’t a rabbi and i don’t even know if it was something she was considering the last guest i have is a man i met recently at a podcast conference i attended in orlando florida we were at a speed networking event for podcasters it was insane and very loud in the hotel ballroom but jay holland stood out he didn’t introduce himself at the time as a pastor but he made great eye contact and shared with me how his son had battled cancer so i’d like you to sit back and relax and i promise you a very thoughtful and heartfelt show it’s a little longer than many of the previous podcast episodes but it’s worth it before you meet molly let me tell you that i did meet her in person several years ago i attended the northwest yoga conference in seattle and she taught one of the extended sessions i i can’t tell you the name of the session but i remember really liking her so i bought her book skip ahead for so years and i noticed a post she wrote in an accessible yoga facebook group i’m in this is in the last couple of months i saw this she was promoting a bedside yoga program that she was teaching and that piqued my interest and i got in touch with her so this fall you’ll learn more about her work in her conversation she told me how she had just graduated from the living school for action and contemplation which explores the heritage of faith from the christian mystical tradition and i know this sounds unusual but it will make sense once you hear the interview but molly’s sister had recently passed away before she attended this program living school for action and contemplation

    if we’re coming from the yoga side we understand this is completely different and i would also say a lot of where my work is moving into especially after having finished this two-year program with father richard rohr is i think a lot of times in the yoga world we are like we’ve sort of run away from and kind of eschewed anything that smacks of abrahamic religiosity or like the judeo-christian religions that most of us grew up in so we’re kind of we kind of steer clear of those so i think from that side when we when we think about meditation we think of meditation and prayer as being something totally different and in many ways prayer is something that we wouldn’t do or we wouldn’t facilitate from the yoga side i actually don’t think that’s true or correct um and i think that also in different traditions so for example in christian mysticism what they might call prayer in many ways like centering prayer for example is uh one of the primary practices of christian mysticism centering prayer is essentially meditation open meditation right but they just use different they use a different term for it so i think it really i think it’s a lot about defining what those terms mean i think also a lot of us who grew up with prayer we still tend to think of petitionary prayer like you know please god like make my mom get better or let this tumor go away or you know whatever it might be those kinds of prayer whereas mystic prayer is more um i would say it ends up being more on the listening side of really sort of listening to the still small listening for the still small voice of god um or when i was just when i was just at my i just graduated my program last week and so i was up in albuquerque with my cohort and one of the people in my group was saying i hate when you know when i want people to pray for me i hate asking them because i feel like why should you be praying for me you know there’s so many other people who need to be prayed for and all of this kind of thing and and i shared with him that i had had an episode on my way to albuquerque um where i’ve been reading texts from my sister that were still on my phone and they actually it wasn’t a positive idea to do at the time and it sort of sent me into a panic attack i guess would be the closest that i could come to and i just um was changing flights and i was kind of losing it in the airport in the dallas airport to the extent that actually it’s a little embarrassing a little vulnerable to say but some of the people from the personnel from personnel from the airport came out and they were like are you okay you know do you need anything in that moment i texted two of my siblings my husband and my best childhood friend and i said you can’t do anything for me but can you just let me know that you’re there and my friends who were in at the living school with me had been talking about how he didn’t like when you know to ask people to pray for him they said well that’s that’s really what prayer is that like you’ve just defined prayer prayer is really the act of reaching out whether to a uh quote unquote real person a material person or to a divine presence and saying can you bear witness to my suffering so that i don’t hold it alone and i think that that is an extremely powerful and useful tool for for all of us to whether you know whatever way we want to define it or whatever religious orientation we might connect with or or push away um the idea of being able to just open ourselves up and ask that we are witnessed in our suffering is is a prayer modality that is extremely healing and useful i’ve already told you that i met robin years ago when we were in college she now lives in concord new hampshire and is in her 10th year as the rabbi for temple beth jacob a congregation of 200 families

    so what is prayer in judaism how how do jews pray when what is the importance and and what are the variety of ways that prayer is part of one’s life

    so in in traditional judaism a jew prays three times a day morning afternoon and evening and prayers are essentially made up of three kinds there are prayers that praise god or bless god there are prayers that thank god and then there are prayers that make requests of god and for most of our prayers outside the sabbath all three kinds are a part of the prayer service on the sabbath however prayers of request are generally removed from the prayer service the idea that the sabbath is a day of rest and if uh god rested on the seventh day when humans rest on the seventh day we continue to allow god to rest and so we don’t ask for prayers we don’t ask for things we don’t make requests of god the only exceptions and these are interesting are prayers for peace and prayers for healing we can ask those questions and ask for those things even on the sabbath so three types of prayers three times a day that we pray but that’s the formula and the formality of prayer i think prayer for jews is as individual as each jew is prayer can be a way to speak directly to the divine prayer can be a way to speak directly to oneself and particularly if one thinks that god is within prayer can even be an expression of aspiration what what i’m hoping for right when we pray for peace or may the one who makes peace in the high heavens brings peace to us we don’t know that there’s peace in high heaven we’re we’re hoping there is but it is what we aspire to on earth and for our own lives and for our family and community so we have lots of prayers for peace and again it’s not that we do it because we think each time we say it it’s gonna um it it’s either we’re frustrated because it feels empty because it’s not being there’s no response because there’s so much war and hatred in the world but again it’s something to which we aspire or it may be something to which we seek ourselves we also note that the word for peace shalom shares its root with the word for healing and wholeness which is schleimut and so really healing means to be at peace i i will often somebody tells me that their loved one is perhaps you know in hospice or dying and i’ll ask them if they want to be on our healing prayer list to which the person will say to me they’re not going to get better and you don’t need to put them on the list and i said a healing prayer is not is not about curing healing and curing are two different things one can be healed by dying at peace with the illness one’s had or the cancer or being able to leave one’s loved ones behind or whatever it is that is that is a peaceful you know a way of healing and bringing about peace but that’s not curing those are two very different things and we don’t pray for curing when when when someone is sick we pray for a refuga is like a complete and whole healing so it’s complete you know completeness and wholeness and health and all wrapped up in that sense of peace so the idea of praying for peace with you know where the person is at not necessarily some sort of miraculous cure there’s like that rational mind knowing that that perhaps can’t happen we’re not looking for magic exactly exactly we’re looking for acceptance we’re looking for you know it’s it’s sort of what i think i don’t remember who wrote about it but somebody wrote about the good death right where you know where you have this sense of i’m not in a place of regret i’m not i don’t have um unfinished business i’m not leaving relationships ugly you know all of those kinds of things where you you come to where you’re completely at peace with with the diagnosis and your ex you have an acceptance of it and you know you you’re able to move forward in a place where there’s really a sense of peace and wholeness to you um but but you know that isn’t to say that when somebody has a kind of you know a chronic condition um which isn’t necessarily a death sentence that is the you know those kinds of prayers for peace are for remission their prayers for a particular course of treatment to work successfully even if we know that the person will come in and out of uh flare-ups to their illness um we still pray for you know you know sort of the receding of the of the uh of the condition you know so yes we can we can ask for things that seem not miraculous but i think most people pray quite frankly for themselves whether or not they’re seeking a connection to the divine prayer helps a person feel centered prayer can help a person feel of that sense of peace many people and i think this is really interesting with the yoga practitioner is that you know peace and prayer and meditation often for some are one of the same and they wake up in the morning and they have a practice that involves prayer and it involves breathing and it involves maybe yoga positions so you know it’s all along a continuum and particularly for those who are not traditional jews orthodox jews who who will wake up and say a set of recite a set of prayers that have been predetermined and and many of them you know that is a deep spiritual connection and they feel that connection to god by doing this and they feel that sense of wholeness and completion for others it feels like an empty recitation and they’re you know they do it because that’s what they’re supposed to do but they don’t always find meaning and i’ve had many a conversation with orthodox jewish friends who say sometimes like they admire the liberal denominations where you can focus on a particular prayer or a particular chant or something that brings you meaning in that moment without feeling like you have to go through a whole whitney of things just to get through them because somebody said you were supposed to do that what about community prayer as a community versus prayer alone or someone coming to you and you praying with them how are you what are the differences there so i think for for most people they are overwhelmed in a positive way when they think about the fact that a community is praying for them so people will very specifically say to me can you include my name on the healing list the prayer list i have three people on there in fact one had a stroke around the time she turned in her early 70s she just had her 80th birthday wow she’s probably yeah she’s probably about as far along as she’s going to get in her rehab she has to live in a nursing home probably for the rest of her life but truly knowing that people were praying for her every time we came together as a community and that we still do gives her so much uh joy and hope and possibility um that you know she’s taken up piano she’s taken up a little bit of painting you know she really has found reasons to live and and it helps her so much knowing that her community is praying for her every week every week every time we join together in a prayer service so it’s fascinating and and fabulous to me and i and i have some other congregants similar i have one who has chronic liver disease and she is on registries and lists waiting for a liver transplant she goes for um treatment three or four times a week um and she is you know she too loves coming to synagogue when she’s able to which she’s usually not she’s usually able to she’s usually so exhausted but it gives her strength feeling and knowing that her community is praying for her and even people in a communal setting where they may say a loved one’s name silently so it’s not even said out loud or they say their own name silently there’s this sense for many people that all of these voices together rise up to some place you know the source the divine call it god whatever and from there goes out into the universe and brings healing to all those in the universe who are in need of healing so many many many people nowadays come to synagogue to say a healing prayer whereas a generation or two ago they would come on the anniversary of the death of a loved one now it’s more to say a healing prayer for their loved one i was reading something yesterday uh because i’m trying to do a little research you know like actual scientific studies um about the power of prayer and i was introduced to the term and i don’t have it in front of me so i may be mispronouncing it intercessory prayer yeah yes you’ve got it intercessory prayer it’s that is where you’re praying for people when they don’t know you’re praying for them and the the the attempt is to figure out if it makes a difference in a person’s life are they going to be cured or healed or whatever measurement the uh whoever is doing the study uses when people who you don’t know we’re praying for you pray for you it’s very controversial as to whether or not uh there is a success rate to it you know someone will point out oh well this showed you know more people with cancer were healed or went into remission than in another study the overwhelming majority of studies show no difference at all and i think that’s partly because for people to get a sense of healing or feel an improvement and therefore then report an improvement they need to know they’re being prayed for so as soon as you add that element to it then most definitely the rate of reported healing or feeling better or even possible cure or remission tends to go up because i think people do really benefit from knowing people are praying for them it’s when you do it without their knowledge is a very controversial part of it of whether or not it’s really has any efficacy i’m glad you’re familiar with that you see you’re very i when i was in rabbinical school i did an independent study with a theology professor on and it was entitled you know why pray for healing and so it was all about it was partially about intercessory prayer but it was also about communal prayer and individual prayer and why we pray you know why go into a hospital room and stand by the side of a bed and ask a person if you can pray for them or you can join them in prayer and pray together why do that why do it in a communal setting all of that and i was trying to i was exploring in that paper of whether i could come up with a theological reason for it and i ultimately decided that no i could not because it was so incredibly individual whereas you know someone was seeking god and someone was seeking community and someone was seeking not to be alone i mean they just wanted to know that somebody cared about them and loved them and held them in their hearts and were willing to pray for them and it was just a way to counter loneliness which i think anybody who has had any kind of a chronic condition a debilitating condition knows exactly what the loneliness of illness is

    so it just happens that i have a history with you but you’re certainly the right person to talk to about all this oh great

    yeah this has been a great interest of mine for a very long time before i moved up to new hampshire i was both a part-time rabbi in a synagogue and i was also a rabbi chaplain for a jewish healing center across three counties in new jersey so i’ve done a lot of this i i’ve worked as a hospice chaplain i’ve i’ve done a lot of it i’ve thought a lot about it i’ve researched it it’s so i mean prayer in general is so individual and i think praying for healing does even more so and i think it’s more so because each one of us reacts to illness so differently so many of us are private people we don’t i remember a member of my congregation a number of years ago had breast cancer she did not want anyone in the congregation to know she did not want to be on the healing list right so i actually keep on the healing list like initials at the bottom where you wouldn’t where nobody would know who they are they you know like say rc maybe there’s probably you know a bunch of people in the community now with the initials rc and it doesn’t even have to be from the congregation that can be somebody i know of and you know in in my family or in you know somebody else who’s just said you know please pray for my uncle richard who doesn’t want to be announced publicly anywhere but so i’ll have those initials down there and i and i will do that with people because even though they don’t want the community to know and they’re very private people they still benefited from knowing that someone was praying for them that someone held them in their heart and you know asked literally asked god for healing each you know so it’s very very very powerful but so individual and it’s so hard to generalize therefore you know you and and we want to allow people to have their prayer life reflect who they are um and especially in a time of illness when everything else in your life is generally not in your control if you’re sitting in a hospital bed everybody else controls you know who comes in when when they poke you when they take your temperature when they do everything when they feed you what you eat everything so if there’s something about it that you can control uh it’s very powerful so being being prayed for by whom when in what capacity is often just the smallest thing to give a person control over well for how how about this um i don’t know what the best term would be i want to say disbeliever that that sounds so negative but someone who is identifies as atheist or agnostic and they’re certainly you know cultural jews or jews who no longer identify as jews but are so jewish have have you had any experience where you know they’re in a time of grieving whether for themselves or some other suffering and they can’t pray but perhaps they are more open to you know meditation or other forms of energy that are less oh oh definitely definitely and that’s where i also as i know somebody i try to either characterize prayer or where the prayer is directed in a way that might resonate with them so as one person once said to me who had a absolutely no belief in god and this was just a general conversation about prayer he said to me you know when i come to synagogue and i say the words of the prayers it’s not because i believe them to be literal he said i just think it adds to the source of energy in the universe that then goes out and touches each one of us she said i don’t think there’s any kind of divine who’s directing it or taking it all in and sending it back out but i do believe in sort of universal energy that our prayers can be added to that energy and so you know when i say the words of a prayer i don’t take the any of the god language literally another person said to me in our house we just add an extra oh and instead of god we think in terms of goodness and so when we pray we’re praying for the good and the well-being of each person we’re praying for goodness in our world and he said and that’s how we practice our judaism you know very active member of the synagogue um it’s it’s not that it keeps anybody from being connected but they’ve made peace with where they have where they are theologically when they have no no belief in god or no sense of god but it doesn’t mean they’re not gonna not gonna participate in prayer because they they recognize and i try to teach that that prayer that prayer is metaphor and i’m not going to tell you what the metaphor is i want you to find it right because because again for each person the metaphor is going to be different that’s why i try to say that people recognize that prayer is often aspirational it’s not a reflection of the way we see the world to be in actuality i know you had your own health scare uh i’m not sure how many years ago but how did that impact you as a spiritual being how did it you know change your relationship to others who go through you know a health scare so um in 2011 i was diagnosed with endometrial cancer so that was one thing but i actually do have two chronic conditions as well so i live with health conditions and scares or you know going in and out of things all the time it has been a challenge to me at times it really has i mean i have to take my own advice sometimes and and think of the metaphor not think literally i remember one time a colleague of mine who was working on his doctorate in in in philosophy and theological philosophy and he asked the question of uh to a whole bunch of people ask the question of what are you most afraid of and the end you know people had you know the climate you know collapsing from climate change and nuclear war and you know all these sort of large catastrophes that could happen and i said to him you know i’m a rabbi and i have something called sjogren’s syndrome that weakens my joints it’s in the family with rheumatoid arthritis and lupus i said you know my biggest fear is my biggest fear is that one day i will open the ark and not be able to pick up the torah scroll that my health will be at some place where i can no longer do what i love to do or what helps me with my sense of identity in the world this is core to who i am and what i do and so prayer for me it’s not the miraculous stuff it’s really that schlemut that that i will have the wisdom to know what tasks to follow that my doctors will have it um that i will keep myself as strong and as possible that i can continue to do these kinds of things i mean i’ve already accepted the fact that the role of what we call hogba which is the person that lists the taurus role at the end of a torah reading i can’t do that i can’t lift it that high above so that the congregation can see it and turn around with it i’ve already given that up but just to pick it up out of the ark that’s what i want to continue to be able to do because my illness mostly affects my hands um that’s where i feel most of my joint pain i also have fibromyalgia so i suffer from muscular pain a lot as well i mean i just sort of have systemic pain throughout my body and so it is for me it is uh um you know a relationship with god who i do believe in who is a source of strength for me uh but really not so much that i expect god to quote unquote do the work but that i do that my loved ones are there for me that my medical providers continue to be wise and caring and things like that that i was going to say that’s the same thing i was seeking in prayer when i had cancer as well you’re open with your community i assume because you’re talking about it on a podcast yes i’m very i’m i’m very open with my community what sjogren’s is how it really differs from the other connective tissue autoimmune conditions is that it is dryness coupled with the muscle pain and the other joint pain and so i have severe dry mouth and dry eye and so every yom kippur i stand before the congregation and before the service begins i actually take a sip of water and i explain that i have an autoimmune condition in which i have severe dry mouth i have to drink or else i will not be able to function and then i talk about the obligation to fast but it is incumbent upon a person if for medical reasons that they must eat or drink that it will be a greater sin for them to fast than to eat or drink and then i recite a meditation prayer written by rabbi simko weintraub that is called a medication for one who cannot do a traditional fast and i offer it to anyone in the congregation who has to eat or drink over yom kippur

    jay holland the man i met at a podcast conference is the senior pastor at covenant fellowship baptist church in stuart florida he has a podcast called let’s parent on purpose i spoke with jay shortly before the hurricane dorian approached the bahamas

    so let’s say you meet someone in one of these you know events that has nothing to do with your church or your community and they find out you’re a pastor and they and they’ve never been affiliated with any sort of religious group and they ask you what is prayer how would you explain that i would say uh on just the most basic level prayer is talking to god it’s the way that that we interact with god um which is a pretty incredible privilege if you think about it i mean i it would take me a few weeks to get an appointment with the mayor of my little town here in stuart it would take me some real connections to meet the governor of florida and and i don’t even know how i could meet the president of the united states but the creator of the universe allows us to come before him anytime we want that’s a a humbling and awesome thing so prayer is prayer is talking to god and are there different ways to pray you know such as alone as a community silently reading scripture how about those different pathways sure yeah absolutely i think um you know when you ask other different ways to pray you think about your relationship with with anybody else are there different conversations that you’ll have with them you know i’ve been married for 12 years and and i love having really engaging conversations with my wife but sometimes i just like being by your side you know we sometimes our time off is just happily being next to one another enjoying the presence of each other even if we don’t have a lot to say so um you know i think prayer a really healthy way sometimes is you know if you don’t know what to pray uh realizing that the book of psalms in the bible it’s it’s a song book it was ancient israel’s song book to god and and most of them are prayers to god and what’s really interesting as you start to get into them is there was a lot of complaining and and i and i actually appreciate that that god found it worthwhile in in his scriptures to show us so many examples of prayer where people’s lives were very messed up where they could not see the other side um where they weren’t just giving god a bunch of false platitudes but they were saying god how long is this going to last i feel surrounded you know there’s one of them that psalm 88 that even ends with you know and darkness is my only friend so there’s some real depths of despair sometimes in prayer but i think i think some of those are the the greatest acts of faith that you can have because to to go to god and say i don’t know what’s going on i don’t trust you know i don’t even know how to trust right now but i trust enough to still come to you is is a pretty extreme act of faith so can you speak to the power of prayer as

    an action of practice for people who are going through

    some sort of chronic uh challenge be it emotional physical

    spiritual yeah absolutely as a matter of fact i can and give you uh just three examples and and and you feel free to use what’s helpful to you uh the first is i i this i’m actually in my second marriage my first marriage i married my high school sweetheart um after five years of dating right after we graduated from college and had a good happy marriage and you know had its bumps just like every young marriage does um that we really loved each other and were doing really well and then she came down with an autoimmune disease called ulcerative colitis and this girl who was full of faith and full of love you know spent days after days of misery and complete agony and every time we would try a treatment she would have an allergic reaction to it or something would go wrong and i mean that the number of different weeks we spent in the hospital and and between that just the number of weeks that she spent at home unable to go out unable to travel um you know there’s some real depression that hit in there and i remember one of the things that that christie would do is she would write out prayers and she would tape them all around the house so you know i would go to the bathroom and there would be prayers and bible verses taped up in there i would walk down the hallway like anywhere anywhere that you’d been it was like a breadcrumb of prayers of just calling out and hope and a lot of it was like lord i don’t understand what’s happening um i don’t know what you’re doing through this but but i still need you and um there’s some incredible comfort in that of of just realizing you know you don’t have all of the answers but you can go to the person who does now she ended up actually dying of the complications of that sickness and so that would be my my second one is um you know leading up to her death as a husband as a caregiver watching the the person i love so much just have everything go wrong there’s a there’s a lot of crying out to god in prayer but also just finding my strength and soulless in that time and i can tell you that just the regular disciplines of of going to god of making that a regular habit and not just going when things are bad but going on a normal basis uh those were things that that prepared me for when she died to be able to walk through that time it was almost like it was almost like in my life god had used her sickness to prepare me for the bombshell of being 27 years old and a widower and so you know i remember during that time just simple prayers of you know and i had a little three-year-old girl with her um and so it was like i i’m in a time where i remember one of my prayers during that time being god i just have a lot of decisions that i have to make but i am just so emotionally and spiritually drained i know i could make some very bad decisions that would affect me and my daughter right now and so god i’m just gonna i’m gonna walk in faith i don’t have enough strength to just sit and discern the right path in every way so i’m going to move and walk and lord i’m just going to ask that you close any door that might be harmful in my life and and i looking back see that god answered that and he did it over and over again not that i made every right decision but it was just amazing with hindsight how many doors he closed that would have been really foolish or harmful and so just as a caregiver of in that depths of loneliness uh a lot of complaining prayers but also gratitude and and thankfulness and how knowing that other people were praying for me and their actual prayers not just the knowledge of it but the fact that people were praying for me lifted my soul and helped me to move on and just gave me great healing able to just celebrate the life that we did have together and the fact that that you know christie is is dead on this earth but that she’s not dead that that she’s alive and with jesus and uh you know knowing that that’s not the last time we’ll see each other was was an incredible help it you know it didn’t make the day-to-day missing her easier but it it made it to where grief was not the monster that could completely consume my life and then the the third example that i would give you is uh just over five years ago in april of 2014 my little five-year-old boy elijah spiked a fever one weekend and on monday when we got him into the emergency room we found out that he had acute lymphoblastic leukemia and so you know from from that morning to mid afternoon that day just the complete floor fell out from underneath us but i even remember being in the back of the ambulance because we were in a little you know small town hospital emergency room and they said the ambulance is coming to take you to the children’s hospital in west palm beach and and i had just let two or three people know you know i’d let my pastor know and my parents and you know my wife was with me but just driving in that ambulance in the back and and starting to get texts from this friend saying hey tell elijah we’re praying for him hey tell elijah we’re praying for him and i feel like that just did not stop for three and a half years of um i i i don’t know that i don’t know that we win a day i know that we never went a day without somebody praying for us but i don’t know that we went a day without somebody reminding us that they were praying for us and um and god used that and i think one of the things that god does is it’s it’s hard to pray for somebody and then not get emotionally and spiritually invested in how they’re actually doing and so you know people would ask what can we do for you it’s like i don’t know you can’t cure my son from cancer so you know just pray and in praying they came up with things to do to help our family um i mean we it was like we went through an extreme makeover homeowner addition when we were down in the hospital we had we had people swarm into our house rip up all of the carpets lay down hardwood floors bought a new heating air conditioning system that had one of those uv lights in it to kill bacteria um i mean that like they they probably put 20 000 in remodeling in our house in the first two weeks that we were in the hospital and and i think all of that was really launched from prayer from just people lifting up to god you know lord help him and sustain this family and what can we do and then god puts things on their hearts and they and they walk so you know that’s the i think that’s one of the beauties of prayer is it’s not a one-way street i have never had god audibly speak back to me but i i mean my my life is just littered with the trail of god stepping in and speaking and you know i’ll sometimes lament about something in prayer and somebody will come along that day and give the answer that i was looking for and and even if i can’t like even if even if my prayers of that day you know like if god doesn’t answer it um sometimes i’m just able to let go because of being able to to just give it to god you know jesus has cast your burdens upon me and cast all your cares upon me and so being able to do that is uh it’s freeing like i don’t have to control the world and i don’t even have to control everything in my life i realize that that there’s somebody who loves me even more deeply than i love myself who i get to interact with and and to lay things at his feet and you know jesus told a parable about god the father saying you know which of you who’s a father if his son asked him for a fish would give him a snake and uh and saying if you being evil know how to do good things for your kids how much more of my heavenly father will do good for those who love him and so i just you know trusting that if i don’t see the answer that i’m looking for right now it’s because because in the grand scheme of things god has something bigger and greater and you know and i’ll be honest like i’ve been really really not happy with that answer in the moment but but over the course of my life you know given a little bit of depth and perspective i just i see the hand of god and what a joy to get to go to him not just when things are bad but also when things are good and when things are just normal you know like one thing about thinking you’re going to lose your son to cancer is is every day is a gift you know the most normal mundane day when nothing remarkable happens is an absolute treasure and remembering to go back and thank god for those treasures um is just something that that i think we fail to do quite often like you know when’s the last time you thanked god for your opposable thumbs well you know wait till you hurt one of them and then all of a sudden it’s a big deal but um we’re just so littered with gifts in our lives and and i think prayer lifts our soul

    and your son elijah five years right five years uh this august actually i think maybe the day we met leslie was was five years from the first cancer-free diagnosis that he had so we keep having celebrations and with his it’s actually five years post treatment before they consider the very uh he’s very high risk for relapse but you know every day we go on as a is another victory day and lowers the chances of relapse so we’ve got another two years of um that cloud kind of being over us but but it’s you know what i’ve got four kids and i’m not guaranteed tomorrow with any of them so elijah’s just the one that gives us perspective on all of that there’s one more thing that i think especially coming from a uniquely christian perspective that is so empowering in prayer in the book of hebrews uh it talks about how jesus is our great high priest and the role of the priest was to come before god you know in the old testament the role of the priest was to come before god on behalf of the people but now we get to go directly to god but we do so alongside jesus and and in hebrews it says we have a great high priest who understands us because he has suffered in every way like we have yet without sin and when i really realized what that meant it meant that you know because like i know jesus was god and i know he was fully man and fully god but i sometimes think that he didn’t live the kind of drudgery life that we do sometimes but he was born into an impoverished family he grew up you know as a day laborer basically as a carpenter he you know in his ministry he was homeless he knew hunger he knew pain he knew betrayal by best friends he knew people in his family not understanding him and laughing at him and thinking he was crazy and so you know one of the confidences that i have in in going to god in prayer is that i you know as i go in jesus name you know and jesus represents me he understands my suffering and and to me that’s having a god that understands our suffering is is pretty profound and i think is is one of those calls like why would you not pray if that’s the case well thank you jay yes ma’am i wish you and your family peace during the storm and i’ll be watching the news and and sending my prayers to i appreciate it yeah i appreciate it and leslie how could i pray for you i just i don’t know that’s a that’s a good question but just recognizing me and who i am and when i do is is uh solace to me

    well good what can i pray for you right now sure all right lord i just thank you for this time with leslie i thank you for putting us in front of one another at the podcast movement and having listened to her podcast some and hearing what she’s doing i just thank you for her i thank you hal she has not fallen into letting this this condition that she has letting letting those challenges be her story and and she’s not fallen into living the rest of her life as a victim and god i pray that as she puts together these podcasts that she uh mentors people god i pray that you would help her to see the goodness of god in her life i pray that that jesus would be very real and evident and i pray that you would help bring the the very people to this show that can be most help we know that there’s so many people out there just on their last ropes so many people in despair and i pray that they could find the show that they could find great comfort in it and that you could help leslie know that she’s doing a really worthwhile work and i pray that you would make it very fruitful in jesus name amen amen thank you jay thank you for listening to glass half full leslie invites you to leave a rating and review on itunes this helps spread the word to others dealing with chronic health issues for show notes updates and more visit the website glass half full dot online glass half full dot online

    you

  • I Am Not A Pretzel: Accessible Yoga

    I Am Not A Pretzel: Accessible Yoga

    Any style of yoga can be made accessible and provide healing for someone with a physical challenge, someone experiencing anxiety and/or depression, or someone with a larger body.

    Three yoga teachers – skilled in making yoga more accessible – share their stories. Rose Kress, of LifeForce Yoga, experienced relief from years of anxiety and chronic pain when she began a yoga practice. Her teachings focus on mood management incorporating both yoga nidra and the use of mudras, or hand gestures.

    Erica Chaney, of Big Bliss Yoga, began her yoga journey in a restorative class where she felt like she learned to breathe more deeply. Today Erica’s teaching focuses on making yoga more accessible to people with larger bodies.

    Clarissa Hidalgo was first introduced to yoga by a fellow patient at a Multiple Sclerosis clinic at UCSF. Now Clarissa primarily works with private clients with a range of health conditions, i.e. fibromyalgia, degenerative disc disease, arthritis, cerebral palsy, as well as MS.

    To learn more about accessible yoga, check out this earlier podcast episode and the organization’s website.

  • My Favorite Things: Conscious Optimism

    My Favorite Things: Conscious Optimism

    Holidays can be tough; that’s why we’re focusing on our favorite things. Peni, Laurel, and Kristl share their voices and 22 previous podcast guests tell us how they beat the funk when dogs bite or bees sting.

    Since this is the shortest podcast episode ever…check out these previous episodes all about optimism:

  • Sound Therapy: I had to do this every day if I wanted to become well again

    Sound Therapy: I had to do this every day if I wanted to become well again

    Sound Bath? Sound Meditation? Sound Symphony?

    Sound therapy has become a wonderful tool to access deep relaxation. For many, it is a gateway to meditation. Melissa Felsenstein of Inner Sounds Meditation shares her story of how playing crystal bowls and metal gongs helped her heal from symptoms of anxiety and depression. A self-proclaimed Nervous System Advocate, after several years of exploring these musical instruments, she now shares her process to help others.

    Check out a video from this Summer Solstice Sound Bath.

    Transcript

    welcome to glass half full with leslie krongold she shares her stories experiences and knowledge of living and coping with a chronic health condition learn about tools and resources and hear inspirational interviews that help you to live a life filled with quality and dignity with two decades of support group leadership leslie’s ready to help you make lemonade out of life’s lemons are you ready are you ready welcome to the summer if you listen to the last podcast episode about nature i hope you’re now trying to get a daily dose of it vitamin n that is this past week i was quite fortunate to get this great double dose of vitamin and at the university of california’s botanical gardens in berkeley on wednesday i attended my first forest bathing led by a certified forest guide but the two and a half hour experience ended in a redwood tree grove and on thursday morning i found myself in the same grove i didn’t sleep there overnight and i was not kidnapped and taken there but i returned for a solstice sound math i would assume most of you listening out there have never been to a sound bath but it’s an experience i bet will come your way soon my first sound bath we always remember our first time right was nearly three years ago in july at a yoga studio in oakland california sound practitioner was melissa felsenstein and she is my guest for today’s episode so perhaps you’re wondering just what is a sound bath is it always experienced in nature and how is leslie able to read my mind

    often i use wikipedia as my go to web page for a solid definition of something but there is no entry for sound math i’ll have to rely on my experiential knowledge so you know when you’re in a bathtub you’re enveloped in water for me this is a truly relaxing experience well in a sound bath you allow yourself to be enveloped by the sound not any sound like i don’t think any cdc concert would qualify but you know who knows melissa uses crystal balls gongs and chimes to create her sound math i’ve been to several sound experiences with different practitioners sometimes it’s called a sound meditation or sound symphony where other instruments in addition to bowls and gongs are used such as a harp wooden xylophone and even a human voice each sound experience is unique many factors contribute to the overall experience who is the practitioner what is the environment like if it’s indoors what are the acoustics like how close to the practitioner am i seated or am i reclined do i shut my eyes and let myself be carried away or do i remain seated so i can watch and listen on thursday i chose to have my eyes open it was a gorgeous sauce this morning in a redwood tree grove and i wanted to videotape portions of melissa’s performance best to keep my eyes and ears open for that what you’re listening to in the background is from that day in the redwood grove you can hear birds communicating in the background and actually when melissa stopped playing the bulls and gongs the birds really went crazy i think they were beckoning for an encore you can already tell i’m partial to melissa’s sound performances i’m a fan shall i say her journey to this work and you know and now after three years she’s making a living as a sound practitioner or healer anyhow her journey is what this episode is all about you can watch a video of the solstice sound bath on the glass half full youtube channel but it’s a best experience live a link to the inner sounds meditation website is in the podcast notes and that’s melissa’s website so i was introduced to sound as therapy in 2008 and i was traveling india and i was at one of those bazaars there was this big market i walked into one that i had i’d known about the tibetan bowls the metal ones they’re metal bowls that are handmade in tibet and in india this was in rajasthan so it’s the northern part of india and so i i went there i saw i saw this this shelves and shelves of metal bowls and i thought oh that’ll be a really fun thing to have and i started talking with the man the store owner and i kept kind of coming back to it like we were there for a couple of days and i kept just wanting to be around this man and just sort of talking with him and i helped him with his business card and some other things and we were just kind of becoming friends and eventually he told me that he used these bowls he used the sounds to help heal children specifically of different ailments and that’s what he was known for and i remember i had this moment like oh my gosh like i’ve always been interested in music i was a dancer so the idea of sound as a way to help people i was just so blown away and i thought and then he was showing me some techniques and i eventually bought a bowl from him and then i convinced him to give me his mallet you know he didn’t want to give me like his mallet but i really wanted his mouth i felt like he was infused with this like power you know and he was very reluctant but somehow i convinced him um and i uh yeah so i came home and i was so inspired from that trip and i thought i’m gonna become a sound healer and then i got home away from india back in the grind of los angeles and i was like that is a crazy idea like who who would ever want that you know i completely denied the dream like i felt the dream and then i i denied it and i was working a corporate job and i just continued and then it’s interesting how you know you have this little if it’s meant to happen it will happen right so i i said i said no and then of course you know a short time later it came back to me like a boomerang i think i just felt like it was just too wild you know and anyway so needless to say um a few years later uh my father fell mentally ill so he was dealing with bipolarism and he was on lithium but then the lithium was really hurting his kidneys and so he was abruptly taken off the lithium by a really bad doctor i don’t know you know someone is a certain way and then you have no idea what might happen really when they’re taken off their meds you just assume it’ll be fine kind of you’re like well what’s gonna change really well everything changed for him everything changed he became manic and he just never recovered he was manic for eight years until he died so uh in the beginning you know he was on the street and it’s interesting how the system i i’ve said this before but the system doesn’t really care that that person was an mit graduate on a scholarship i mean my father was brilliant he worked for hewlett-packard his entire career starting right when he graduated from mit just this really brilliant man very kind and soft-hearted and always taking in stray animals and just a very introverted introverted quiet genius and but the system doesn’t care it doesn’t care that what you were you’re just like another person you’re another number and so he was lost in the system of just mental hospitals and um all sorts of situations that i i don’t really want to go into too much too much detail because it’s um it’s painful but we’ll just say that it was it was a really bad time and so i was very close to my dad i’d say we both had this kind of wild adventurous self that we both understood and we were both a little bit weird and we liked like kind of things that were a little different from other people and he really encouraged me to be an art major he loved the arts he loved that i loved music he loved that i danced so it was really supportive and just i don’t know fun we were like pen pals during that you know my college years so anyway when he got sick um i was doing yoga i was doing kind of your typical exercise and but my nervous system was becoming so

    it was becoming so severely imbalanced because i was so afraid all the time for my dad i was afraid for his health i was afraid for my mom’s safety i was afraid for everyone else’s safety he became kind of a dangerous man he became an angry man so um and his his own safety for himself and uh it just became too much you know there’s a certain amount of stress you can deal with but then when that stress keeps going like whether it’s a chronic illness right you understand that and just dealing with this something that’s relentless it doesn’t it doesn’t ever let you go and you don’t know what’s down the line you don’t know what’s down the line you have to become it’s very uneasy it’s unsettling you can’t ever get kind of grounded and feel confident or sure and i think about that like chronic illness or or cancer treatment and sort of my experience too there’s a lot of commonalities and i think a lot similarly this happens for everyone’s nervous system that’s under chronic intense stress you know basically like everyone else i stopped sleeping i was insomniac um because i just couldn’t rest my mind at night so that and then i stopped sleeping then i wasn’t able to eat and digest you know i could barely eat anything i was losing weight i felt sick all the time and bloated and it just felt awful i had migraines i had tmj i had teeth grinding and eventually it got to the point where i had like a shake as well like like and i was losing my hair i mean it was wow severe anxiety severe severe anxiety and as that started to compound i was also greeted with depression because you start to really feel down when you can’t get yourself healthy and you’re seeing you know i think depression it’s different from sadness i mean i was sad about my dad but depression is this there’s a quality to it that’s um so gray it’s so bleak and i could feel that with just this idea that tomorrow is going to look exactly like today right and when you look into the future and that’s all you see is a broken body and sadness grief you know at the time i didn’t realize i was grieving the loss of my dad right like i had lost my dad he was here but who he was was someone like completely foreign to me occasionally over those seven years i’d see this little spark and i’d remember who he was and he’d do a little joke or something and it gets me like teared up just thinking about god it was such a hard time um but was there also an element of fear that this could be your future oh yeah that’s a really good point yeah like i looked into my own future and i was like oh wow this could be it because i was still going to yoga classes and i remember being so like angry and i was very bitter a lot of the time because i was so um mad that my life was lost and my dad’s life and my family my family you know we were sort of broken up by the situation as any family would it’s very very hard to deal with mental illness i asked melissa about her reintroduction to the sound work how did she recapture that dream she originally had in india so i would go to these yoga classes and yoga had always been my savior it always been my refuge and i would sit in shavasana i would just steam i was just so mad because like i kind of felt like even that was taken from me like no matter what style of yoga i did it didn’t work i was doing acupuncture which i always felt exhausted by like i felt like it took something from me to show up to get there to receive treatment and then afterward i was always super tired reiki same thing i tried talk therapy i tried some western medicine i was basically just doing anything i could and i just i just didn’t have any extra energy for anything i was barely able to kind of just show up in my life and just kind of just get through the hours of every day so a few different people um encouraged me to take some time off and i and i did and one person actually said she was like you know i really she was my my therapist and she said i think you should like go to an ashram so i did i did and it was a brilliant move because they’re so disciplined there’s a lot of chanting and that’s kind of when i opened up to this other side of yoga that wasn’t just asana you know asana is the movement it was the chanting and then the meditation um and you know just kind of broadening out what what this concept of of yoga was and at the same time i was taking some classes around my neighborhood and i walked into this class and little did i know at the very end in shavasana she plays a crystal ball and i just had this moment where i could feel my whole body responding to the sound you know that deep deep relaxation and i could feel even my nervous system kind of calming down and it was really brief you know it was only like a minute or two and i just thought i don’t care why or how i’m just going to i walked up i was like what is this i didn’t even know what it was she’s like this is a crystal ball and i was like what and then i just bought them and i had them delivered and i taught myself how to play i bought i bought three of them from home shop in florida no they don’t make them there no no almost all the bowls are made in china actually but um so uh and they were delivered in like you know eight business days and i just unpacked them and just started to play them because i just at that point i was like i don’t care what it is i don’t care what tool it is because i i think i think the pivotal moment too wasn’t just how i felt when i heard the ball and i think it also was that it created hope for me a hope like that future that i saw before that we were talking about where every day is the same and you almost just want to give up you know it’s like why keep living why do i want to live i don’t want to live like this you know and i think a lot of people are confronted with that um often in our lives uh but so it brought me this tiny bit of hope like maybe it could be different maybe i could just try and use this so the sound came back to me under much more rough circumstances um and you know unlike some sound healers uh sound is taking off right now and there’s a lot of different healers out there but i think the thing that makes it slightly different for me was like it was necessary this wasn’t a choice it wasn’t like i like gongs these sound so pretty they’re fun they are fun they’re outrageously fun to play to feel it in your body as you play it’s amazing and i could see that draw but for me it was necessary like i had to do this every day if i wanted to become well again

    i don’t know i just feel like the gongs what what they did for me i felt like you know i started for like a month or two with just the bulls and they really rewired my nervous system but i was missing the jump for my depression like i still couldn’t quite mitigate that and um i think the gongs really help with that because they take you into this ethereal meditative open space so when i got the gong it’s jupiter jupiter was the gong each of each of the gongs have a um they’re a certain note that’s aligned with the orbital properties of each planet and they have they have the base note and then they have two overtone notes as well that’s how they’re different from orchestral gongs which are not tuned at all so when i have eight gongs or something i can set them up to be very harmonious based on notes or feelings or dissonant you know but orchestral gongs you can’t do that they’re all just set they they’re tuned to sound pleasant but that’s about it so these are really special instruments and they’re so high quality they’re all made of an alloy of of metal oh okay so they vary in what they’re made of well depending on the maker yeah every maker has their secret recipe so piste’s got a recipe and meinel has a recipe and um nobody wants to give up their secret recipe because it’s a combination of different metals okay to make the sound and of course you know there’s also there’s gong gongs have been around for thousands of years um so there’s chinese gongs and tai gongs and burmese gongs and how did you know you wanted to go to gongs like yeah that’s that’s a good question i don’t know there was an intuition that just you know i did go to a few sound meditations at the time in l.a and i would go and i would feel this like distinct calling like if if i really really want to feel healthy i’m going to need this and i i think it was so it was intuitive but once i got it i did notice a big difference in my healing experience

    it’s very hard to describe this the state of being

    i always struggle with it on paper and through voice because it’s like a place that’s beyond time i don’t know it’s a place beyond words it’s a it’s a feeling it takes you into this almost like to the soundless place that’s where the gongs take you it’s like you’re you’ve got to prepare the the mind you got to create the pathway in into the silence and i think the gongs really help with that and when we can find silence in different ways rather than just through meditation which is so hard for most people including me i mean i became a meditator after i used sound as meditation as a meditative tool but um so we all struggle with sitting there you know and in yoga they they have you do pranayama first so that way you can do a little breathing technique and then hopefully get your mind ready well in the same way that’s what the sound is doing the sound is stimulating your mind it’s stimulating your senses it’s stimulating your cells it’s vibrating everything it’s unpredictable the gong i don’t even know how it’s gonna show up you know some days i do a hit that i’ve done a million times and it just looks like crazy um so it’s very unpredictable and so the mind can’t um the mind relaxes in that actually it doesn’t it doesn’t grasp it’s not able to grasp to rhythm you know it sort of has to deal with unpredictability which is good because it makes it more flexible but the the sounds i think or this is what i know the sounds of the gongs

    are trying to prepare your mind for the sounds without the gongs to prepare it to kind of clear those everyday thoughts out of the way with sound because it takes over just it’s not going to let you spend a lot of time thinking about your grocery list

    melissa explains how her playing of the gongs was a healing process remember she was doing this on her own still the gongs and the crystal balls were tools for her own healing also getting a lot of strength from that space too right resiliency you kind of feel like you can get through these difficult points of our lives and you know my dad’s story you know as as i got better and better and better you know dad got worse so you know right as i was launching my business my dad was dying you know so um and i’m smiling right now which no one can see uh and it’s because you know he brought me the biggest gift like would i have found this if everything had stayed the same probably not or maybe it would come to me in a different way we don’t know um if you’re meant to do it apparently it comes back again again yeah but uh yeah i mean his he’s he’s he’s an inspiration for it and also i really felt like the sound as therapy and for myself really expanded my capacity to just handle more you know and so even though dad was going through so much i felt very robust and i let go of the need for him to be the way he used to be and i accepted who he was and i accepted his own karma if you believe in that his own path like i can’t change that it’s what his soul needs and i can just support him with love and kindness and caring and it really having those kind of realizations helped immensely with the guilt and the pain

    and i’d say i really started to feel better about a month into it and then really powerful changes in the nervous system three months later and i’d say the depression was really reigned in and sort of obliterated probably six months into it wow so yeah within a year i was already doing really i was a really different person and over the years people were like wow you’re so less gritty like you’re so much more soft i used to be really kind of intense and kind of feisty so it’s it’s it’s changed my pulse you know it’s changed my own vibration and and um but it was you know i started out with myself and i remember my friends they were like what have you been doing you seem different and i was like well i was kind of embarrassed about it i was like well i kind of do this stuff with sound and they’re like what i’m like they’re like that sounds cool like they’re all into it you know and i was like i don’t know and they’re like we should you should you should play for us and i was like i don’t know about that it really like i was pretty reluctant to share um for many reasons you know i kind of felt like well what kind of person is a sound a sound practitioner i’m even afraid to say healer it just feels too heavy what kind of person is that like who does that you know and i’m like that’s not me i like to eat hot dogs and hamburgers bacon i love bacon god if i could have that every day i would and i love to like drink wine and i i’m very standard in many ways just like i’m just a normal chick like you know who is this and so i was very um embarrassed and even when i first moved here you know that was a three years ago i launched my business full-time after doing a few of those events you know and then kind of growing a little bit in la but but i knew i just knew i needed to come here i need to come back home this is where i’m i’m bored i was born in south bay and now that melissa’s been sharing her healing tools with others for over three years she’s learned a lot about the instruments and how people respond to her performances i asked her to elaborate on this it’s organic and you’re really like for me i’m just listening i’m listening so intensely to wait and sort of find the sound that’s special because every sound meditation has several of them and it’s a it could be a rhythm it could be especially with the gongs the bowls are interesting how they show up every time too a little different but the gongs they definitely have their own

    individual way to them for each one and so i’m just searching i’m looking around and just trying to find okay where’s that nice and i hear it and i’m like oh what’s that what’s happening here and i’m like oh that’s exciting you know even after years and years and years and years of playing i have those moments every time or where one gong who normally plays very dark and deep is showing up right what’s this about what happened and i’m sure you could go into all sorts of like um the physicists are always like well it’s the temperature of the room and this and that but really i i think there’s something more to this that’s um less scientific and less rational because i could have the same exact two gongs playing for a private session and the person changes but nothing else does and they show up differently and i think that’s also me as a practitioner because like i said i i’m intimate with these instruments they were a big part of who i am and who i’ve become and i have a great respect for them so i’m really i could there’s many people who just want to you know aggressively go at the gong because it’s so exciting it’s so stimulating and it’s fun as a player it’s fun but as a recipient it can be create a lot of intensity and i’ve heard so many people go to these other experiences and say i hated it you know i will never do it again i found that to be like i was panicked the whole time and it’s because your nervous system you know doesn’t understand these sounds and they sound scary and they it just goes into fight or flight so as a player i’m very aware of that and because i’m a nervous system advocate and i’m trying to re-teach people how to relax i’m trying to calm their nervous system down and to clear their minds that’s my intent it’s like a healing environment i am mitigating the gongs quite a bit you know what i mean i i’m really working with them from that standpoint it’s almost like they know that that’s what they need to do and i know that’s what i need to do so but they will play very very very differently and we’re talking like nothing else in the environment has changed so you have to wonder well what is that about well it depends it depends how scientific you want to be or if you want to be open to you know the potential that there’s some greater forces happening that affect how they show up but it’s this idea that this is what i mean by there could be something more and i think there is i’m saying could because i’m being a coward well do you think the energy of the people yeah okay i think so the energy of the people that i understand right you do but you know the average person i don’t know um but yeah the energy of the people um and i get a lot of intuitive because i’m going into a very meditate meditative state i get a lot of intuitive hits as well about people so about like a stranger i don’t even know them but as i’m playing you know there’s a rhythm and there’s a feeling and i’m like oh

    i had a few questions from melissa that were less about her journey and more about the science behind the use of sound as a therapeutic tool i asked her to talk about brain entrainment a term i wasn’t familiar with but is often mentioned in this line of work so entrainment is the ability for our brains as animals as humans um and animals to synchronize and so this is how large fish can swim together as one organism or if you’ve ever seen a huge group of birds and they’re might and they’re they’re turning like a mass and it’s not because they’re talking to each other like let’s make a left no it’s because they’re entrained they’re near each other and they’re synchronized two heart cells placed near each other but not touching synchronize pendulums synchronize together um in a conversation actually there’s entrainment with body language so if i were to sit here and put my my chin on my hand you might eventually do that if i rub my nose you’re gonna rub your nose actually that happens every time because people are worried about like is this the whole mirror neurons yeah it’s mirror neurons yeah and yeah entrainment so um in this case your brain waves are synchronizing with the sound waves and the sound waves have tons of properties that induce deeper states of slower slower brainwave states or deeper states of relaxation some of it’s the tonal qualities they have high tones and low tones going together they have very low frequency tones as well that can help they aren’t pure notes so they’re normally flat or sharp by a random amount as your your brain receives these tones it entrains and naturally starts to slow down and it’s through that process that you can go into these deeper states so you can drop into the beta state you know relax tape and the theta lots of people drop into delta as you know so delta brainwave state is deep deep sleep so it’s the kind of sleep that you get after like massive travel right and you’re so tired and you’re like oh my god i’m exhausted boom and then 12 hours later you wake up so it’s like that but imagine getting that in just a one hour experience and say you get 45 minutes of it and it’s rich sleep

    my belief you know there’s been a lot of connection around sound healing and cancer treatment my feeling is you know with some of these conditions fibromyalgia chronic pain conditions where our sleep is affected i really it’s extremely nourishing because it’s that rich rich sleep and they find that people are falling asleep and sleeping eight hours but we wake up and we’re tired and there’s disputes about that right maybe it’s you’re waking up at the wrong time of your cycle of your sleep cycle but there has been some research um of late that says that actually it’s you’re not getting delta because we go to sleep and we’re thinking about all these things and we’re stimulated by the ipad and whatever else that we’re using which i’m guilty of and many others right we’re we’re on the line or we’re reading a book or something and we’re too stimulated and we sort of fall asleep thinking about our to-do list and then we wake up thinking about our to-do list and we’re not rested because we’re not actually getting that sleep but you can train your brain and that’s what the sound does so it’s cumulative so each time people they come to the sound meditations and their brain through neuroplasticity which is so amazing right we used to think that your brain was done growing at like 17. and now we know oh my god brains are changing all the time all the time and so you can get better sleep i mean i’m proof of it right like you can restore your entire nervous system from you know it was [ __ ] before to like robust and healthy and healthy immune system and everything just with sound that’s what i did but it’s not some kind of snake oil it’s through science you know if you can get into these delta brainwave states and your brain also starts to learn about the theta brainwave state which is so hard to describe that was the space i was talking about you know inner space a place that is boundless it’s free every time i walk in i it just gets bigger you know there’s so much space in there and there’s so much beauty and it’s a feeling um but your brain starts to get used to it it starts to unlock and become more comfortable with these states that we’re becoming less and less aware of and our ability to get into them on our own is becoming harder and harder simply because we’re being pulled in so many directions right like technology has been great but now we’re always kind of multitasking and the brain necessarily wasn’t made for that or the nervous system the nervous system hasn’t really improved in the way that technology has right it’s an old system so your nervous system doesn’t realize like oh actually i’m not being chased by a bear i’m just late to a meeting like it could be worse right it can’t differentiate but and the body responds in the same way either way and that’s where we get destructive with stress that’s when stress becomes destructive but there’s ways that are easy have no side effects you know sound has no side effects it has only benefit and you know when i said in the very beginning i was doing these other modalities and i felt like they took away from me and i had a private client say the same thing and he so beautifully said he’s like when i come to sound it always feels like it gives to me it doesn’t take it just gives and i love that about it as a therapeutic tool i hope you enjoyed this episode perhaps you might consider exploring this healing modality by attending a sound bath in your area or even trying to see how you react with different sound tools watch the youtube video segments on glass apple’s channel to learn more and check out melissa’s website thanks for listening thank you for listening to glass half full leslie invites you to leave a rating and review on itunes this helps spread the word to others dealing with chronic health issues for show notes updates and more visit the website glass half full dot online last half full dot online

  • Support Groups: Attend, Launch, or Facilitate

    It’s all about support groups! Listen to several support group facilitators talk about their experiences attending and eventually facilitating a support group. Patient advocacy organizations represented include the Muscular Dystrophy Association, Multiple Sclerosis Foundation, and the FSH Society. Support groups organized through MeetUp cover chronic illness and life transitions.

    For more information about launching a support group, check out this recent article in Quest magazine.

    Feel free to comment here or on our Facebook page. If you facilitate a support group and want to be part of the conversation, contact us.

  • Stories of Healing with Essential Oils

    Stories of Healing with Essential Oils

    This episode features personal stories about how the use of essential oils has helped with a variety of conditions including depression, anxiety, fibromyalgia, fatigue, post-surgical pain and post cancer treatment.

    If you’re interested in deepening your exploration of essential oils, please leave me a note here.

    For information about Dr. Kris Gast’s medical practice you can visit her radiation oncology website or Beauty through Health website.

    To learn more about Lori Melero’s alternative care practice, visit her website.

    Loose Transcription

    It’s hot this week – in northern California – and heat is a trigger for me. It exacerbates my symptoms. Oddly enough, most people I know with my condition – myotonic dystrophy – tend to feel better in the heat and have problems with the cold. Give me the cold any day. We have the air conditioning turned up right now and I’m using a variety of tools to help me through it. And one of those tools is natural essential oils. Peppermint is a good one to help with a little cooling.

    Using essential oils isn’t necessarily a new tool for me but as I learn more about various oils and how they can help with my physical and emotional well-being, they’re becoming a more helpful and necessary tool.

    So this episode is all about essential oils. I wanted to share personal stories rather than a bunch of factoids about essential oils.

    Actually, he used to say…we have a really BIG show for you tonight…but I couldn’t find that sound bite. But…we do have a REALLY BIG show for you. Stories about how using essential oils have helped for a variety of conditions including depression, fibromyalgia, post-surgical pain and post cancer treatment.

    First let me share my story. I remember buying essential oils at the health food store when I was young. I bought them for the fragrance…I loved jasmine, patchouli, musk. It wasn’t until years later when I realized there were differences in the quality of the essential oil. So many of them have additional chemicals added and weren’t a pure therapeutic grade quality oil.

    My first experience with a therapeutic grade essential oil was…lavender. I’ve been carrying around a lavender roll-on with me for at least 10 or so years. I use it every night as part of my sleep hygiene routine but I also use it to fight a bout of anxiety during the day.

    About two years ago I met Valerie Jew — an Urban Zen integrative healing practitioner featured in an earlier podcast – she introduced me to other essential oils. I’ve been gradually exploring them since and learning about their healing qualities. There is a lot to learn. I’m using oils in a variety of ways – rubbing on my feet, diffusing them in the air, and occasionally using them in foods and beverages. They’re a great addition to my nightly bath ritual.

    Just this month I began a year-long program that culminates with a certification as an essential oils wellness practitioner. But, I digress…I’ll tell you more about this after you hear a few personal stories.

    The first guest is Mindy Kim – Mindy was in this year’s first podcast episode when I asked people to share their New Year’s resolutions. Mindy lives with her family in North Carolina and she also has myotonic dystrophy. Exploring the use of essential oils was one of her goals for the new year.

    Mindy I bought my oils and I’m ready to start using them. I hope it will be a healthier year in general.

    Back in April Mindy and I spoke again and she shared how her health goals were progressing.

    Mindy I ordered the DDR prime oil. I roll it on my feet. I love it. I can’t pinpoint it. it makes me feel like I’m doing something good for my body. I ask about other oils she’s tried. In the book it mentions basil but I haven’t used it yet. I like the idea that I’m doing something positive for my body. I don’t have to use it every day with a meal like medications. It feels good on my feet. I like the idea that it’s ancient since before Jesus’ time. I’m very happy with my oils.

    The oil Mindy mentioned is considered a supplement. I’ve been applying it to my feet every morning for the last couple of months and I, too, feel like it’s a positive experience. It apparently works on cellular energy and it’s been helping with my daily fatigue. Plus, I appreciate the morning ritual of oiling the bottoms of my feet.

    Previously I mentioned Valerie Jew who turned me on to oils beyond my lavender. Her daughter, Laura, is my next guest. Laura began exploring essential oils as a child.

    Laura My earliest memory when I was 10 and my mom and my brother went to Bali for a yoga retreat. There were so many mosquitoes. My aunt took out lavender EO, rub it on our palms…it took mosquitoes away. It wasn’t associated with my use of them emotionally. In the program Urban Zen an integrative…one of the modalities. I got introduced into the spectrum…it’s been an all-around journey.
    Laura So, one part of my story is that I have chronic depression. I’ve had it since adolescence. At that point see a therapist, get on anti-depressants. For year – I’m almost 30 – it was fatalistic view…your mental health is up to some foreign expert and taking drugs. My epiphany came when I was in the UZ program – along with restorative yoga I started noticing I felt more grounded. A happy accident – I forgot to take my anti-depressants one day. I stopped taking pills and did oils, meditation, yoga…I had my ups and downs…I learned a sense of empowerment. I’ll start with citrus oils in the morning. I’ll bring 2-3 oils with me for the day. I’m more in tune with my body. I’m feeling my energy drop a little bit, I’ll take peppermint. It has fostered this amazing connectivity between my physical self and my spiritual self and my mental self.
    Laura One of the first things I do is take a shower I put oils in the bottom of the shower. It creates a steam…I mention the shower mister…usually I put peppermint on the back of my neck or on my palms I’ll inhale. I will take peppermint oil with a full glass of water. I’ll use cedar wood, vetiver…floral oils are calming. Lavender or clary sage. I mention so many…geranium is another favorite.
    Cinnamon is one of my favorites for the winter. My body wants something different. She’s completely off anti-depressants. I say “that’s very powerful”

    Laura’s story is very inspirational. I’d love to hear from other people that have had a similar experience of transitioning off pharmaceuticals but the friends I know who are either diagnosed with clinical depression or bipolar disorder have quite adamantly told me they the drugs they’re on and it would be frightening to stray from the routine that now works for them.

    I wonder how doctors would respond to this switch from pharmaceuticals to the use of essential oils? There are medical doctors exploring the application of essential oils in their practice. I recently met one – well – virtually met – Dr. Kris Gast. Remember I said I’m studying essential oils; the course I’m taking has an online classroom component and I saw Kris’ post about implementing essential oils in her medical practice so I jumped at the opportunity to speak with her. Her medical practice is in Fort Smith, Arkansas which is on the border of Arkansas and Oklahoma.

    Kris I originally started in medicine in the 80s – radiation oncology – a lot of computers, big linear accelerators…at this point people retire…I have so many patients have followed and see them once/year. I have a huge population…2/3 to 75% cancer patients survive. It’s part of the practice to make them happier and healthier in their lives. It’s been driven by their patients to expand the practice to have other tools.
    Kris A lot of our patients will go through chemotherapy or placed on hormone pills and all of that causes health issues. They always gain weight. I searched for diets. Not just a cancer provider to make sure their other health issues are…I asked about implementing EO. We started using the recipe for insomnia. One menopause recipe. I’m in the process of doing this right now. it gives them an alternative to adding another pill to their ever-growing pile. Old now is like 85. They’ll be like on 20 meds. We get them detoxed and out there doing what they like to do.
    Kris I ask how receptive they’ve been. Most of these people in our practice they’re pretty much rural; they have land, grow gardens. They have a history in their family that may date back Indian blood…they used to use this concoction. Our location…Irish and Choctaw and Cherokee Indians. They like natural.
    Kris It’s so much fun; it’s helped me be able to say I can practice for another 20-30 years. My staff is so good for our patients…we’ll all take it. anything give a patient I’ve tried it on myself. It helps us understand that something really works.
    Kris

    Kris

    		 I think that most doctors do not come to their full potential until they’ve been a patient. I’ve had a chronic illness for 20 years – fibromyalgia – and it’s been a struggle to find anything that helps. I ask about EO for fibro. The first thing that has helped the most was to keep moving…the movement was the only relief. One of my employees encouraged me to become gluten free. Now I look at food to see not how it will taste but what will it make me feel like. The EO for myself to help me sleep better…my recipe is frankincense and lavender. I can sleep 5-6 hours straight. I rub it on my hands and on the back of my neck before I go to bed.

    Until doctors get sick and have to take pills, I don’ think they’ll be very receptive to it…

    Wouldn’t you want Kris as part of your medical team? We can all hope for a future when doctors will be open and receptive to alternative modes of healing.

    The final essential oil story I have for you today is also part of that cross-section of natural healing and western medicine. Lori Melero has been a massage therapist and wellness coach for 20 years. I knew Lori from a local qigong class and had heard through a mutual friend that she recently used essential oils to recover from a rather dramatic surgery.

    Lori My earliest experience with oils was in 1997 when I did massage therapy. In 2014, someone introduced me to doTerra. In 2014 I got reintroduced to them. I stopped using oils and they had synthetics and I was allergic. I ask if she did it for the aroma; she was. She didn’t know about the healing benefits. Lavender, eucalyptus, peppermint. A yoga instructor offered a massage with her oils. Aroma Touch session. My body completely opened like a flower. It was like a cleanse.

    Once reacquainted with therapeutic grade essential oils, Lori used different blends for allergies, digestive issues and created a lotion with frankincense which helped her with inflammation and a hematoma from a fall.

    Lori Back in 2010 I had a gall bladder attack. I went to doctor and advised I get the gall bladder removed. The stone was 2 millimeters. Drink olive oil and lemon juice. I passed the stone. I changed my diet. I was great for 6 years. I ate an egg and cheese experienced with pain. Rushed to the ER. They did tests and I had a 7-millimeter stone. After the procedure, they put a scope down the throat…I became septic. They had to consult with surgeons. They waited a few days to see if would heal. I came out of it and…my white blood cell count was going up. I had a blood transfusion. Another major surgery – clamped my stomach…I don’t remember a lot because they had me on a lot of medication. I asked for my diffuser and lavender. I was in the hospital for 11 days. Once I came home they offered me Norco for pain. My husband had to say, “she said no.” I took Advil for 1-2 weeks. I used frankincense and DigestZen. I put it on the bottoms of my feet. I was in bed for some time. I had feeding tubes…
    You used the diffuser…my oils next to me. I would pick which one was suitable for me. Whatever one resonated for me at the time is what I used.
    Lori I’m doing great; at least 90%

    So…now I ask you…are essential oils part of your tool chest? If not, and you’d like to learn more, please contact me via the Glass Half Full website or the Glass Half Full Facebook group. I’ve embarked on diving deeper into my knowledge of essential oils and will soon be starting a side project for those that would like to join me.

    Future podcast episodes may touch upon essential oils but I’ll continue to mix things up. After all, it’s good to have a lot of tools available.

  • Medical Cannabis

    Medical Cannabis

    This podcast episode explores the experiences of six people who have used medical cannabis for a variety of conditions including cancer, depression, muscular dystrophy, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, bone fracture, and bipolar disorder.

    There’s a lot of information about medical cannabis but I recommend watching this CNN documentary. Check this map to see where your U.S. state is in terms of medical cannabis legalization.

  • The Healing Power of Touch

    The Healing Power of Touch

    Acupressure, Swedish, Shiatsu, Reflexology, Cranial-Sacral, Rolfing, Sports — these are all different massage modalities. Carl Johns, massage therapist and instructor at McKinnon Institute, practices what he calls Acucraniatsu.

    In this podcast episode Carl answers my questions about medical massage, reflexology, and working with clients who have a chronic health condition.

    A couple of books Carl mentions are: Job’s Body by Deane Juhan and Touching: The Human Significance of the Skin by Ashley Montagu.